For the record, they’re still called the ulna and radius on chickens. The radius is for chumps because the ulna is longer and thus theoretically has more meat on it. However, with her penchant for bisection, Danielle had likely already compensated for this ensuring a fifty-fifty split of ingestible flesh.
Something else Danielle and I have been sharing lately is a collection of Magic: The Gathering cards. Now, I used to play this game as a child, acquiring a second-hand starter deck when I was around ten and playing until all the other enthusiasts dried up upon starting high school. So I have literally been out of the game for over dozen years, almost half my lifespan, a really long time. You’d figure that’d be long enough to sever, irrevocably, any ties between these cards and my wallet, but the creators of these cards are very good at selling them.
Let’s get hypothetical. You’re sitting there on the couch perusing the latest offerings from your game console’s marketplace when you happen across Magic: Duels of the Planeswalkers. It’s like that card game nerds play, but on your Gamebox, so it’s cool. Free demo is an easy sale, and before you know it you’re working through a tutorial on counterspells. After a few hours you realize you’re enjoying yourself enough to unlock the full game to expand your deck options.
Here is where shit gets real.
When you buy the game, it gives you a code. This code can be turned in at the website for a voucher, and this voucher can be turned in at your local comic shop for a limited edition foil card. It’s like a quest from War of Fantasy Four, and it’s just one card, something to put on the shelf between Call of Battlefield and Sports League 2010. So you hit the shops and a lady at the counter hands you a tastefully shiny Magic card. Oh, and why don’t you take this complementary pair of fully playable starter decks? Don’t mind if you do?
Congratulations, nerd, all that’s left is for you to introduce one of your friends to your new pusher. By the way, your next sixty cards’ll cost you twenty bucks.
Now, to be honest, Danielle and I were hooked somewhere between code and voucher, likely owing to my existing addiction, but still this setup is dastardly. They even have a product now that includes around two hundred and fifty cards to get you started at a bargain price, that they only print in limited supply so you’re force to buy the more potent, less cost-effective booster packs when they run out. Their business model has a startling amount in common with the Ten Crack Commandments.
But, bro, there is no finer way to sort.
Ja.